I’ve “died” 117 times.
The hull breach warning is attacking my senses, and the panic that is typically associated - by genetics - with the prospect of death is creeping around the edges of my awareness.
GhostSight’s shields were gone almost instantly after the first barrages started. Her armor - bolstered by my own extensive training in repair and reinforcement techniques, lasted a bit longer, but she was never going to tank this damage. She was a powerful ghost, an invisible spectre only manifesting for short periods, but anchor her to reality and she was a clumsy thing, unprepared for violence. My connection to the ship via the pod controls and implants is complete, and a part of me feels the powerful tackle technology as a sluggishness and weight dragging me down.
My informorph - what my parents would have called aadaman, or soul - will survive to live again in a new clone. However, my adrenal glands don’t know that and are still pumping fight-or-flight compounds into my bloodstream in an affort to motivate me to action, action made impossible by the stasis webs and scram currently entangling the ungainly Covert Ops frigate.
I’m watching the cycle finish on my burst jammer - the first burst didn’t break the target lock. I’d had to go with a faction multispectral since you never know what racial sensors you’re going to be up against in Anoikis, but that also means that you’ve got even less of a chance of the jam hitting; sucks to be me today I guess. While I’m hoping to get one more jam attempt off, I’m also searching for a warp out, hoping to save my pod if (when) GhostSight loses her final battle.
Finally, someplace deeper, I’ve started focusing inward, preparing for the technology-facilitated “rebirth” that will find me back in Zoohen. It’s nothing like the spiritual journey of an Idama, no matter how many lives I live, but it’s what I have.